The Nativity: A Review

I saw The Nativity the theatre with my wife – my pops picked up AJ and took him and his cousins to Chuck E. Cheese’s. We had originally intended on watching the supposed snuff film Apocalypto, but due to time constraints were unable to make the right showing to be back in time. The only show worth watching that was playing on our schedule was Nativity, so we watched.

One thing I’ll say right off the top – if you’re expecting something as powerful as Mel Gibson’s Passion of the Christ, then don’t see this movie. Don’t get me wrong, it has it’s moments, but it’s not there by a longshot. It’s clearly not written from a Christian perspective, playing heavy on the Magi and King Herod as main characters, and uses that well known Hollywood creative license with the recorded facts in the case. The exact lines that gave me this impression fail to come to mind, but I definitely came away with a “multiculturalized” feel from the movie.

Instead of remaining true to the timeline in the Bible, they re-arrange major details to make the film fit nicely into a two hour timeslot. It makes for a sappy Christmas card setting to portray the Magi appearing at the stable along with the shepherds on that first Christmas Eve as the movie presents it, but the Bible says the Magi visited and saw Jesus at "the house" where Joseph and Mary were residing. Most biblical scholars believe this was at least several months later, perhaps as much as ten to twelve months. This undoubtedly entered into Herod's decision to have all male children two years old and under killed "in accordance with the time he had learned from the Magi." (Matt. 2:16)

But according to the movie's time line, why didn't Herod just have male babies two months old and under killed? Again, for some unknown reason, the movie gives us the impression that the Magi decided on their own not to return to King Herod. Not only would it have been more dramatic, but also biblically accurate if the movie would have shown the Magi telling us that they had been warned in a dream not to go back to Herod, returning to their country by another route. It's a shame that the movie completely disregards this and inaccurately presents this as their own decision.

Cinematically speaking, the efforts to make the Magi amiable are well intentioned, it ends up just being a bit goofy. The gadgets they use in their astronomy/astrology efforts are comical and out of place in this film. Herod's character isn't developed well enough; he was a complex politician, and more insight into his actions would have been useful for the context of the story. Although Herod is generally believed to have been ruthless and barbaric in his efforts to maintain his sovereignty; the film goes overboard, making him a typical psycho stereotype. A few events at the end are compressed in their chronology, although that may be a plus, by showing all the visitors to the newborn Jesus simultaneously.

Overall, I would say that most of the flaws are a result of weak directing. At times it felt fragmented and in-cohesive as a story. I felt like I was watching a moving picture book rather than a movie. The film should have had much more impact than it did. As it is, it feels more of a sentimental story for those who know and love it. But as an evangelical tool that shows the world a glimpse of wondrous news, I believe it falls far short of its potential power.

/rizzn

I'm SICK of hearing about the ENVIRONMENT!

I'm firmly convinced that the world has been taken by some ridiculous hoax to do something about global warming. For years and years, I've seemingly been one of the few people aware of the fact that human influenced global warming is a hoax from a very young age. I've also known that the hole in the ozone over the Arctic pole has been gone for close to four or five years now (I'd actually have the pictures from the NASA website proving this here, but they appear to have taken the website down and replaced it with a cryptic press release about ANTarctic ozone holes).

The other day, my wife and I were watching ABC News late at night, and there was a movie review segment up that was talking about the movie Happy Feet. Rather than talk about the movie itself and if it was any good or not, the reporter/reviewer instead decided to use the movie as a platform to talk about Global Warming and how we were all going to die, starting first with the penguins.

I'm a bit tired of this type of mumbo jumbo - there have yet to be any conclusive proof presented to me by a reputable scientific study showing that the earth is on a global warming trend. The data just doesn't support it. The data they try to use is the same data they used two decades ago to try to prove global cooling, and the catalyst is supposedly a molecule named the CFC, something that is emitted in greater quantities by active volcanoes each year than has been emitted by the entirety of human existence.

Then I see this: outgoing British prime minister Tony Blair is pushing to upgrade the country's aging nuclear arsenal in light of Iran and North Korea's renewed interest in nuclear proliferation. A member of the opposition party has this to say (pay attention to the bolded statement):

Former environment minister Michael Meacher told the BBC that parliament was being "bounced" into a decision.

He said: "What's really worrying about this is the fact that the country and parliament are being bounced and that we don't have to take this decision at breakneck speed.

"The Vanguard submarines are going to be operational until about 2026, the missiles probably don't have to be changed until 2042. There's absolutely no reason why we can't take this decision next year or in five years' time.

"It will severely restrict much more needed conventional defence expenditure, it will undermine the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty worldwide and drain off a colossal sum of money from where it is most needed: dealing with the real threats we face from terrorism: climate change and long-term energy security."

Seriously. Of the list of things to be worried about in this world, above being blown to smithereens by insane assholes who hate you takes a back seat to the unshakey possibility that the temperature average over the entire world might possibly increase by a point or two. Maybe.

Somebody elect me to something please. I need a bigger soapbox to talk these idiots down.

/rizzn

Migratory patterns of soccerballs and spaceships.

Wow, I’m dragging butt today – so so so friggin’ tired.  I did indeed make it to the Serenity pre-screening two nights ago. I’ll post a bit of a review below.  I also figured out why my traffic has been kicking so much butt lately – I’ve been linked three times in the last couple weeks by the National Ledger, here, here, and here.  Also, I did indeed level up again with my kobold character on IRP, for those of you who are keeping track.

Finally, the Blip migration is going swimmingly as I’ve freed up nine gigabytes of storage on the old server, so that podcasts, radio shows, and database synchronisations should be running with a greater degree of reliability now.  I’m still going to say that I’m going to hold off on the email tech support responses for another day because there will be problems in this migration, I just haven’t hit them yet.  When I do, you’ll know, because I’ll be bellyaching loudly to all within earshot.

Naked Podcaster: Soccergirl comes to Rant
I usually don’t write about podcasters who aren’t on Blip, because I tend to believe in promoting from within, but hey man, it’s Soccergirl.  At any rate, Smokehouse, proving once again he’s the most powerful man in internet radio, got Soccergirl to come be a radio show host over there at RantRadio.  The next move is to bring her over to Blip.  One step at a time, I suppose.

I must confess, I don’t really listen to her show, so I’m not sure how entertaining it is, although I do know it’s really popular.  It may have to do with the fact she is a naked podcaster, and a hot one at that, or (as I will find out this week), she may indeed be entertaining to boot!

Her show is scheduled for Tuesdays at 5 PM Pacific/8PM Eastern, 30 minutes, Pre-recorded. Hopefully to start on October 4.

America’s Most Wanted: Tom Delay
Tom DeLay got indicted.  For once, I’m not going to get all wordy on the political topic today, mostly because I don’t think the topic warrants more than a brief mention.  The man is innocent, all you have to do is read the indictment to find out they’ve got nothing.  I do find it interesting that the so called “fair and balanced” news outlet New York Times is running GoogleAds on this particular story (versus the thousands of other stories that come out on a daily basis) to advertise their paper.  I mean it’s not like I’m real surprised or anything, I just find it slightly humorous they’ve just given up the fight on appearing balanced and have just gone over to being a left-wing-rag and proud of it.

Serenity: One Beer
On the copywritten beer scale of movie ratings (pioneered by Darrell and I) where the less beers, the higher quality the movie, I give Serenity one beer. 

I went in expecting at least some representation from the movie people (usually, at these premieres, they have some big guns from the studio there to talk or promote the movie), but at this one, all they had was one of the local SouFla radio stations to give away stupid tshirts and ask inane trivia questions (“I’ll take information I’ll never use for $100, Alex.”, “What are two games they play on Y100’s morning show?”).  After the corporate Clearchannel whoring was finished, there was a couple a few rows down from me that hijacked the microphone and proposed to his girlfriend (“Last month, in bed, you asked for a ring, and I pretended I was asleep.  Here’s a ring.”).

Shortly following the bad intro by the studio rep, the bad proposal, and the bad trivia questions by the talent from the local bad radio station, there began a good trailer for the worst movie idea in all of history: Doom, the movie.  Yes, Doom, like the first person shooter without a storyline that pioneered first person shooters.  Much of the movie looks like it was filmed in first person shooter mode, too.  I can’t imagine the movie being any good whatsoever, but I also can’t imagine myself missing that flick, mostly because it’s frickin’ Doom, man!

Then began the movie.  They took a page out of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy with the long 15 minute intro before any credits and intro music showed up.  The first thing I noticed was the quality of the music itself.  It really was dynamic and mood setting – something that’s sorely lacking from a lot of movies lately, most of whom seem to be content slapping together montages and medleys of whatever Rick Dees-nuts is playing at the time.

The flick itself reminded me a lot of Farscape – intelligent dialog with well thought out sub-plots.  This isn’t your typical hackneyed Star Trek script here.  It definately fit the genre of Space Drama/Space Western that has been developing over the years.  It also had overtones of political commentary in a manner so sublime, you couldn’t be offended no matter your party affiliation (although if it poked at anyones, it would be the ultra-politically-correct liberal crowd).

It is noteworthy to say that Joss and the scriptwriters avoid the snarky, tongue-in-cheek dialog in this flick that has made Joss a household name (although not avoiding sarcasm and well-placed-humor altogether). There were, also, shades of Clockwork Orange in the movie in some of the original vernacular that was written into the script (ostensibly to account for the evolution of language in the future – i.e. “I haven’t seen any action betwixt me nether-regions in nigh on a year,” from a character that talked relatively normally throughout the rest of the film).

All in all, the movie was more than palatable, it was entertaining.  It’s not going to win any Oscars, most likely, and it’s not going on my top five movies of all time.  On the other hand, especially given the low bar movies have set the last year or two, this one would definately make my top ten for the year, mostly because it avoids cliche and satisfies me in the same way your typical Joss Whedon project would satisfy.

/rizzn

Ray Kurzweil's New Book... and Snakes on a Plane?

We love you, Ray!
Thanks, Glen Reynolds:

RAY KURZWEIL'S BOOK comes out tomorrow. Here's a post on Kurzweil by Tyler Cowen ("It is no longer intellectually acceptable not to know his major arguments."). And here's a review from Kirkus. And here's my interview of Kurzweil.

UPDATE: More thoughts from Matthew Yglesias. And from Kevin Drum. (I liked this comment, which echoes this column.) The blogosphere is certainly buzzing.

ANOTHER UPDATE: More blogosphere buzz here: "The book might alternatively be titled 'The Modern Futurist Consensus: a Review' . . . My own two cents thrown into the ring say that the class of future portrayed in TSiN is something of a foregone conclusion. It's quite likely that we'll all be wildly, humorously wrong about the details of implementation, culture and usage, but - barring existential catastrophe or disaster - the technological capabilities discussed in TSiN will come to pass." There's much more.

Freakin’ AWESOME.  Ray Kurzweil is to Mark as J. K. Rowling is to Kelly.

In What the Hell news…
Snakes on a Plane?  The synopsis tells me nothing more than the title:  On board a flight over the Pacific Ocean, an assassin, bent on killing a passenger who's a witness in protective custody, let loose a crate full of deadly snakes.   You’d think this is a joke, or a really bad Troma film, but no! Check it out! It’s real, and it stars Samuel L. Jackson, Flex Alexander, Rachel Blanchard, Juliana Margulies, Nathan Phillips, Tygh Runyan, David Koechner. 

It's a movie about snakes on a plane, how creative could a title with that subject matter be? All the good snake movie titles have been taken, and so have most of the bad ones. It used to be called Flight 121, but Jackson insisted it be called Snakes on a Plane, and that's what it's called.

So many questions. How many snakes? What kind of snakes? What kind of relationship does Sammy L have with the snakes? Does he see his childhood in their eyes? Can snakes love? Can snakes love...on a plane? Can snakes love a plane? How many pina coladas can snakes drink? How many pina coladas can Sammy L drink? How many snakes can Sammy L drink?

This is going to be emotional, I can tell. It's going to have heart.

A lot of you may be asking yourself things like: why was this made or why was this actually given money to be made or why would any actor be involved in it or would anyone go and see it?

The answer to all those questions and more is simply “Snakes on a Plane.”

I can’t wait for the inevitable sequels and knock offs that will be sure to follow.  Snakes on a Boat! Snakes on a Submarine! Snakes on the Space Shuttle!  Snakes on a chopper! Snakes in a tank! Snakes on an intergalatic spaceship! Snakes on the moon! Snakes in bed! Snake on a giant turtle! Snakes in your face! Snakes in a Hot Air Balloon! Snakes on a Bus With Keanu Reeves and Sandrah Bullock! 

Snakes on a Tandem!  Lance Armstrong (appearing as himself) decides to enter the Tour de France on a tandem only for his co-cyclist behind him to be none other than a reticulated python who has orders to kill him. However by the end of the race the python has become firm friends with Lance and decides to give up being a hired assssssssssasssssin and become a professional cyclist with Lance.  From there, their partnership becmes the greatest ever and they win every bike race... ever!

Hollywood is clearly stuck on stupid.

/rizzn

Update from Northern Florida and these USEFUL links from Blogger.com

How to not get fired from your job from Blogger.com - Blogger keeps posting these interesting news articles -- how to not get fired from your job from your blog postings or what to do if your mom finds your blog. These are interesting articles that I would have looked for in the Onion a few years ago, but are actually relevant news items today. Weird that truth is stranger than fiction, yes? How long till our news headlines are either completely divorced from reality only to keep our sense of sanity and familiarity to entertain us.



Regardless, I did watch Matrix Revolutions last night. Despite what many people might say, I honestly believe that if you are a true believer, you catch the drift and were not dissappointed. I can see how the fairweather fans were disappointed simply because the format of the movie appeared on the surface to be more of an action flick. This, however, hid within the fast and furious action moments many recurring characters and a culmination of the different motifs at play within the entire trilogy. The Christ Motif was most apparent, but of course hidden beneath all that was the Erisian motif (discordian), the OT Motif (old testament), the Hindi and Eastern motifs all coming together into what essentially could be interpreted as a very complex one world-ian type intellectual religion.



I need to analyze it a few more times in my mind before I come out with a very definitive review, but needless to say there was enough meet within the movie to keep me chewing on it for a while... so it was definately worth the price of admission (although I didn't pay for admission, thank you my love for the wonderful gift of the ticket).