Kate Moss Does Coke, World Takes Collective Gasp

Update (9/21/2005): An update on the Cocaine Kate story. Was linked by the National Ledger at some point recently.

Yeah right. There’s been a fair amount of controversy in the blog-o-sphere about Kate Moss’s coke pictures – Gawker wussied out as soon as some lawyers called them and took the pictures down, but not before your intrepid blogger over here snagged those bad mamma jammas. Just so the lawsuits go exactly where they’re supposed to, these originally came from the UK Mirror.

In case you’re blind or you’re looking at the monitor from an angle (cuz, y’know, Kate’s pretty skinny, y’know. Like a piece of paper. Nevermind), these pictures are of Kate Moss at some party doing heroic rails of cocaine. Allegedly. You look at them and tell me. I mean it could be some white meth, or powdered sugar.

From my surfing around the Kate Moss Rumor-Monger sites today, the following results of her hoovering that stuff up her cute, little nose are going to or are already happening:

1) Her endorsement deals are in deep doo-doo.

2) She’s on record as having responded: “f-ck off, f-ck off, f-ck off, f-ck off, f-ck off!”

3) There’s nothing hotter than an anorexic coke whore with a potty mouth.

4) She might lose her kid (Lila) to her ex-husband.

4) She’s breaking up with her boyfriend to prevent this.

5) He’s probably the guy who gave it to her, because he’s a big druggie guy or something.

6) There is no number six.

By the way that thing about being blind wasn’t a crack – I know I have blind readers now, thanks to a couple tech support conversations I’ve had on the Blip line.

/rizzn

Frontpage, and the programmers that love it.

Can I just say one thing, one very very small thing?

Anyone, I don’t care who you are (I don’t care if you are friggin Ghandi, Bill Gates, Linus Torvaalds or Your Mom), if you use Frontpage and Frontpage Extensions in your web development, you are stupid stupid stupid and deserve either capital punishment or shock treatment.  No exceptions.

“Why Rizzn,” you say, “whatever is the problem? Has someone infringed their software evangelism into your fragile litle world?”

I’m sorry, but you don’t want to get all sarcastic with me on this.  Not now.  Not ever. 

First of all, Frontpage has this wonderful little feature that once you load up a page in Frontpage that was created in any other HTML editor, it will never work in Dreamweaver or any other editor again.  It does something with the line returns, adding in a little code at the end so that your code comes out looking like something you’d find in a compost heap.

Second of all, it loves to throw in all this non-standard CSS XML tagging into EVERY SINGLE TAG as if the semi-colon were some sort of curly-q and Frontpage were a fountain pen.  Seriously!  What is up doubling the size of an HTML page with useless code?  Why?  I implore you.

Lastly, the irrational love of this ridiculous programs shows that you are a lazy lazy coder. Seriously.  I mean I love drag and drop as much as the next guy, but do you really need a program to write buggy, often inoperable ASP for you that badly?  How hard is it to mosey over to hotscripts.com, copy and paste some code, and erase the comments that says it belongs to someone else?  Do you really need Frontpage to write you code that emails you someone’s idiotic comments off your website?  Are you that incapable of rightclicking on a blank explorer window and left clicking on ‘create access database’ that you must rely on the database creation tools with Frontpage?

“Ok, I get it dude, but why are you so worked up?” you query.

Because this company – the company I work for called AACS – decided to code several critical systems with Frontpage ASP creation utilities.  These utilities handle some of our payment methods.  I’m getting reamed out for not fixing the code (that I did not write by the way) that Frontpage created since we’ve lost about $1000 this week so far to lost sales.

It seems, and note my lack of disbelief or surprise, that Frontpage Extensions simply randomly stopped working on the server, thereby disabling our payment options for a day.

Wha wha WHAT? You mean Frontpage not so good wurk well?

Yes indeed.

You put your trust in software widely known to be buggy for 5+ years, you can the trust it to bite you on your ass at some point.

And here endeth the lesson.

/rizzn

Howdy Kelly Clarkson fans

Somehow I got linked on the Kelly Clarkson Express message board.  Because I have not the patience to dig through their thousands and thousands of links and pages, I have no idea where but in what context, but I’m pretty sure it happenned yesterday because before yesterday, I had no incoming links in my stats from there, and today, about 400 people came in from there.  So hey-diddly-ho-there KCE people.

I’m still putting together the basics I’m going to need to create that Miami Area entertainment blog.  I don’t think I’ve talked about it publicly, but for those of you who are interested in participating and contributing to an area Miami version of Gawker, let me know.  I want to guage actual committment levels before I start committing myself to these PR firms and wire services.

In other news, there’s some big Blip announcements coming this weekend.  We’re unveiling a major new feature, and we might be unveiling something even bigger than a feature, so stay tuned for that  excitement.  The Rizzn Inner Circle knows what I’m talking about (most of it does, anyways.  If you haven’t called me in the last few days and you’re in the Inner Circle , (you know who you are) then you’re missing out on some big news!).

Work’s been a huge drag lately.  Sales for AACS were sagging last week, so I got tasked to help with sales.  Listen, don’t get me wrong – I can sell if I have to.  I just prefer not to.  I’ve got better things to do, and I generally think sales is best left to automated web sites.  Honestly, I’ve never really gotten into the thrill of ‘closing a sale.’  It doesn’t do anything for me.  I’m a creator, I get a thrill from knowing I’m the author of a 30,000 line monster code project or knowing I created a snippet that does in 5 lines what most coders do in 20 or something like that.  Writing convoluted and obfuscated code is a guilty pleasure of mine.

Does any of that sound like someone who should be in a sales department?  No!

I rest my case, your honor.

Also, one more thing – CSPAN3 REALLY BITES!  It’s the only CSPAN channel (not to mention the only video streaming site EVAR) I know of that streams video at 21 kbps.  Basically I’ve been watching a slideshow with audio for the last two days because I’m deadly interested in watching these John Roberts hearings.

I’m such a damn geek.

Appearing courtesy of the home office located at imao.us, the TOP TEN:

TOP TEN DIFFERENCES OF THE CHIEF JUSTICE FROM REGULAR JUSTICES

10. Gets permanent 10% discount at participating Target stores.
9. Flowing Chief Justice robes allows for him to glide for short distances.
8. Has the power to dictate what Wednesday's special is at the Supreme Court cafeteria (must be chosen from a list of available entrees).
7. Given magical amulet to ward off mummies, making sure there is always at least one Justice in case of nationwide mummy attacks.
6. If he wants to, he can wear a hat (so far, no one has wanted to).
5. Must be able to accurately chuck a gavel at and strike a man-sized target at fifty paces.
4. Subjected to gamma rays to give him superpowers and/or cancer.
3. While expected to be stoic during Supreme Court hearings during the day, is also expected to extract vigilante justice at night.
2. Only Justice who can put a halt to proceedings because he needs to pee.

And the number one difference of the Chief Justice from regular Justices is...

Has to have actually read the Constitution.

/rizzn

Justice Roberts Confirmation Hearings

I’ve been watching the Justice Roberts confirmation hearings.

It’s amazing, this guy’s got the charisma that Al Gore was fabled to have before he became everyone’s favorite 2 x 4 vice president.  You know what I’m talking about?  Remember back when then Governor Clinton selected Al Gore to be his running mate?  Everyone talked about how this guy was charismatic and people on both sides of the aisle thought he was tre cool and all that?

Justice John Roberts is actually charming the pants off these Democrats!  And I seemed to have discovered his superpower.  Let’s go into the Wayback Machine and I’ll show you what I’m talking about.

<scene does that groovy wipe thing and fades to the 2004 Presidential Debates>

Watch John Kerry talk.  Notice how as he opens his mouth, you sort of zone out after about four words and you just hear the Charlie Brown adult sounds … mwah mw mwah mwah mwah.

<scene does that groovy wipe thing and fades back to the the present John Roberts confirmation hearing>

Watch John Roberts talk – when it comes to a question he doesn’t want to answer clearly, he switches into John Kerry mode, and the questioner zones out on his answer, and it disorients him because he wants to peg him on something, but he can’t for the life of him remember what Mr. Roberts just got through saying.  Then the next softball question comes along, and Mr. Roberts will say something amusing, and there you go, everyone loves him again.

It’s kindof creepy, in a way.  He turns it on and off at will!  The force is strong with this one.

/rizzn

Stupid, Stupid Media

One of these things is not like the others.  One of these things is not quite the same. Try to spot which one’s not like the others.  If you can you’ve played our game.

Old Media:

Michael Kinsley has blown the whistle on his former employer, CNN. As reported by Drudge, Kinsley says that the network is coaching guests to "get angry" when they go on the air to discuss Hurricane Katrina. Kinsley bases this accusation on the experience of a colleague at the Los Angeles Times who appeared on CNN.

New Media:

Stan Tillinghast is a retired cardiologist who, when Hurricane Katrina hit, cashed in some miles for a plane ticket to Jackson, Mississippi, rented a car, and started driving until he came to people who needed his help. He started a blog, Dr. Goodheart (he means your heart, not his) to record his experiences.

Old Media:

"I'm still waiting on the floating corpses. To that end, I have sent away for five pounds of Chocolate Babies to act as 'floaters' in the new drink I'll be inventing this week: The Floating Corpse. ... I'm thinking Creme de Cacao, Kahlua, some rum, maybe a little cream and a floating Chocolate Baby.

"Of course, I'll fine tune that and come up with a 'secret ingredient' or two, but that's the general cocktail framework that I'm thinking of presently. Sort of a Mudslide, without the mud. More of a Muddy Waters." -- Chicago radio host, Steve Dahl

New Media:

The city braced for more grim discoveries as the receding waters allowed search parties to reach isolated buildings. But the death toll -- 279 for Louisiana -- was still far below the initial prediction of the city's mayor that 10,000 perished.

"It's hot. It smells. But most of the houses we are looking at are empty," Oregon National Guard Staff Sgt. James Lindseth, 33, said as his platoon, inspecting for people dead or alive, worked its way through dank and broken homes that had been in the water a few days ago.

Old Media:

"This President is never gonna do the right thing. I think somewhere deep down inside him he takes a lot of joy about losing people, if he thinks they vote Democrat or if he thinks they're poor, or if he thinks they're in a blue state, whatever his reasons are not to rescue those people..." -- Air America's Randi Rhodes

New Media:

Christianity Today does a Q&A with New Orleans' Canal Street Presbyterian Church's Pastor Mike Hogg. In the aftermath of Katrina, MarkDRoberts discovered that Hogg, an old friend of Roberts, had become pastor of Canal Street Pres, and Roberts' church quickly decided to partner with Canal Street in the latter's long term recovery and outreach to the city. It is a partnership with many parallels in many denominations, and a model that is replicating as more and more impacted churches find a way to telegraph (or blog) their need. NZ Bear's new portal --due this weekend of Monday-- will facilitate such matching of like institutions.

Hat tips to Hugh Hewitt, Powerline, Little Green Footballs, Michelle Malkin, and Instapundit.

On the Turntables Currently: mutagene - Wolf Tracks on Wax

Blame Game, Part 2: FEMA Chief Brown Resigns

Director of FEMA Michael Brown resigned a few minutes ago.  Honestly, I’m completely sick of the Hurricane Blame Game coverage lately, so I’m not going to going to go way into it.  I’ve got a long post about all of this that I can’t bring myself to finish simply because the whole subject is so depressing.  It’s sickening, but I’m actually glad the power went out in Los Angeles today so I at least get to look at something besides the Governor of Louisana telling me how crappy our president is.

Given all of that, I can understand why the FEMA director would quit even if he did nothing wrong (it was, after all, one of the quickest deployments of federal aide to a national disaster site in history).  Take my website, katrinalostandfound.org – I’ve just about given up on it because I ran into so much resistance and retarded flak from all sides just for doing something I considered good.  The site runs itself, and to be honest, I haven’t even bothered to check whether or not anyone’s using it.

In any event, this will be one of the last few Katrina or Katrina-related posts around here.

/rizzn

On the Turntables Currently: - Doctor_Who_-_Synthetik_FM_Mix

Actually, pretty interesting...

I usually don’t post quizs and stuff, but this one was interesting enough for me to want to pass along:  http://www.crush007.com/love.cgi?id=1126539091hjz

/rizzn

On the Turntables Currently: DJ Rizzn - My Fury